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Hop Shoots on Trial by jay n | Neume
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Hop Shoots on Trial
jay n
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Hop Shoots on Trial
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Yo, check the grocery receipt, man.You gotta be kidding me.A thousand dollars for a bag of weeds?Yeah, it's time to expose the most overrated crop in the soil. Let's go. Look at you hiding out in the woodland edges, trying to look rareCharging one thousand dollars a kilo like you're elite or something squareBut you're just glorified asparagus with a massive ego tripA tiny little green sprout draining bank accounts on every single tripPeople out here doing back-breaking labor just to pick you from a ditchAnd when you finally hit the frying pan, your taste profile is switchRaw, you taste bitter and astringent, completely unpalatable to the tongue Look at you hiding out in the woodland edges, trying to look rareCharging one thousand dollars a kilo like you're elite or something squareBut you're just glorified asparagus with a massive ego tripA tiny little green sprout draining bank accounts on every single tripPeople out here doing back-breaking labor just to pick you from a ditchAnd when you finally hit the frying pan, your taste profile is switchRaw, you taste bitter and astringent, completely unpalatable to the tongue Hop shoots, you're a joke, you're a wallet-killing fraudActing like you're culinary royalty, demanding that we applaudYou cost a whole luxury vacation but you're just a tiny weedI'd rather eat a bag of basic spinach, that's the real food I needVerse 2Takes three whole years just to mature and grow up into a stemAll that waiting for a vegetable that doesn't even have a gemIf you aren't turning into beer, nobody cares about your nameYou're just the leftover scraps playing an expensive hype gameSautéed in luxury butter just to mask how you actually taste Paying rent-money prices for a leaf is an absolute wasteCaviar has flavor, truffles have a distinct, rich profile scentBut you're just a crunchy sprig that makes a massive financial dentOutroYeah, keep sitting on your high horse in Belgium and FranceYou aren't a delicacy, you're just a high-maintenance plantNext time I want greens, I'm heading straight for the dollar aisleHop shoots, your financial reign is officially on trial. Peace.
Lyrics
[intro]
Yo, check the grocery receipt, man.
You gotta be kidding me.
A thousand dollars for a bag of weeds?
Yeah, it's time to expose the most overrated crop in the soil.
Let's go.
[verse]
Look at you hiding out in the woodland edges, trying to look rare
Charging one thousand dollars a kilo like you're elite or something square
But you're just glorified asparagus with a massive ego trip
A tiny little green sprout draining bank accounts on every single trip
People out here doing back-breaking labor just to pick you from a ditch
And when you finally hit the frying pan, your taste profile is switch
Raw, you taste bitter and astringent, completely unpalatable to the tongue
[chorus]
Hop shoots, you're a joke, you're a wallet-killing fraud
Acting like you're culinary royalty, demanding that we applaud
You cost a whole luxury vacation but you're just a tiny weed
I'd rather eat a bag of basic spinach, that's the real food I need
[verse]
Takes three whole years just to mature and grow up into a stem
All that waiting for a vegetable that doesn't even have a gem
If you aren't turning into beer, nobody cares about your name
You're just the leftover scraps playing an expensive hype game
Sautéed in luxury butter just to mask how you actually taste
Paying rent-money prices for a leaf is an absolute waste
Caviar has flavor, truffles have a distinct, rich profile scent
But you're just a crunchy sprig that makes a massive financial dent
[outro]
Yeah, keep sitting on your high horse in Belgium and France
You aren't a delicacy, you're just a high-maintenance plant
Next time I want greens, I'm heading straight for the dollar aisle
Hop shoots, your financial reign is officially on trial.
Peace.
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