Average Joel

Intro

Yo, check the mic. We need to talk about a certain someone. Not a legend, not a king... just Joel. Yeah, "Average Joel." Let’s go.

Verse

First off, Joel, let’s look at the stats

You’re trailing behind like a runner with flats.

You walk in the room and the energy dies

Even your shadow is rolling its eyes.

You claim you’re a 10, but the math isn’t adding

Your ego is huge but it’s mostly just padding.

You’re the human version of a "404 Error"

Looking in the mirror must be pure terror.

Chorus

Oh Joel, you’re chasing the clout

But nobody knows what you’re talking about.

You’re a legend in your head, a ghost in the street

Take a seat, Joel, you’ve been beat.

Verse

Let’s talk about your style—or the lack thereof

You’re wearing trends that only a mother could love.

You try to be edgy, you try to be "main"

But you’ve got the personality of a window pane.

You’re the guy who brings a spoon to a knife fight

You’re the "low battery" warning in the middle of the night.

If boring was a sport, you’d have the gold medal

You’re the noise of a bike with a broken pedal.

Verse

You’re always talking big like you’re the CEO

But you’re the guy at the cinema in the very front row.

Awkward, confused, and just in the way

A "Coming Soon" trailer for a movie they’ll never play.

Your jokes are like dial-up, they take too long to load

You’re the "Terms and Conditions" that nobody read, Joel.

You’re a background character, a glitch in the scene

The most forgettable person that’s ever been seen.

Bridge

(Beat slows down, gets quiet)

Wait, did Joel say something? Nah, just the wind.

Just a minor inconvenience. A typo in the book of life.

Verse

I’d go harder on you, but it wouldn’t be fair

It’s hard to roast someone who isn’t even there.

You’re a placeholder, a "to-be-confirmed"

You’re the lesson that everyone else has learned.

So pack up the act and put down the mic

Go back to the shadows, take a very long hike.

This isn’t a beef, it’s just a reality check

And you’re standing there with a blank look on your neck.

Outro

Yeah. Average Joel. Don’t respond. It’ll just be embarrassing.

We’re done here.