Christmas Chaos

Intro

Ho-ho—oh, oh—hey-ya, ha!

Ba-da-bum, ba-da-bum, jing-a-ling, jing-a-ling

Verse

Grandma's wearing lights like a Christmas crown (bling, bling)

Uncle's mistletoe stuck on his forehead now

The cat climbed up and declared the tree his throne

Ornaments singing when they hit the floor—oh no, oh no

The gingerbread man is filing a complaint

Said the oven's lawyer burned his suit and paint

There's a fruitcake in the hallway used as a doorstop

It winked, "I'm timeless," and then it started to hop

Pre-chorus

Neighbors caroled at midnight with a kazoo (toot, toot)

The snowman took a selfie and deleted it too

Missed socks under the tree doing a slow parade

And the twinkle lights are tangled in a serenade (ooh)

Chorus

It's Christmas chaos, Christmas chaos—ho-ho, oh-oh

Presents in pajamas, candy canes on the go (go, go)

It's Christmas chaos, Christmas chaos—heh-heh, ayy

Santa's stuck in the chimney but he waved and said, "okay" (okay)

It's Christmas chaos, Christmas chaos—oh-oh, oh-oh

We toast to the mayhem with a mug of eggnog glow

It's Christmas chaos, Christmas chaos—na-na, na-na

Sing it loud, sing it wrong, that's how we do the holiday—ha!

Verse

Rudolph joined a Zoom call, forgot to mute his snort

Prancer's Wi‑Fi lag made him dance a little short (skrrt)

Sleigh's in the driveway with a parking ticket note

Signed by the parking elf—"Please move your sled, you goat"

Auntie knitted sweaters that look like modern art

They blink and hum and occasionally fall apart

The stockings are a mixtape of weird odd socks and jokes

There’s glitter in the casserole and tinsel in the yolks

Bridge

We wrapped the cat in wrapping paper—don't tell mom (shh)

He learned to roll like a present and then he grew a pom-pom

The tree is doing yoga, trying to find its center

Kids are building forts with boxes—fort of epic splendor (aye)

Chorus

It's Christmas chaos, Christmas chaos—ho-ho, oh-oh

Presents in pajamas, candy canes on the go (go, go)

It's Christmas chaos, Christmas chaos—heh-heh, ayy

Santa's stuck in the chimney but he waved and said, "okay" (okay)

It's Christmas chaos, Christmas chaos—oh-oh, oh-oh

We toast to the mayhem with a mug of eggnog glow

It's Christmas chaos, Christmas chaos—na-na, na-na

Sing it loud, sing it wrong, that's how we do the holiday—ha!

Outro

Ho-ho—oh, oh—hey-ya, ha!

Merry mess, merry mess, pass the cookies (pass 'em)

Merry mess, merry mess, hug the chaos tight

Merry mess, merry mess—goodnight, goodnight!