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Welcome to the Family by Brian Grant | Neume
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Welcome to the Family
Brian Grant
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“
”
My wife Sheila Mary . Sheila Mary is kind, considerate and always thinks of others. She has however also got an obsession , everything needs to be clean, almost surgically sterilised and no clothes, shoes plates or cups can be left lying around the house . The shower and toilet area also need to be pristine after each use or else you will feel her wrath. She also has a bad habit of saying the same thing repeatedly to make sure you get her point . Chiara ( Pronounced Kee ar ah) is young beautiful, clever and funny . She is also very fit and healthy , runs on the treadmill regularly and loves to boast that she ran a half marathon. She is however also moody, mean and hates to part with money and never does any housework. Chiara also pretends to be vegetarian however her favorite meal of the week is a Sunday roast . Stefan is also young handsome, clever , funny and talented . He is also very disciplined and keen to achieve the best in life. However he knows it and is very big headed and boastful and thinks everyone else is stupid . He thinks he is the smartest as he is studying to be a doctor and gets called “Johnny Big Time” . He is also lazy and unhelpful , just like his sister , he never helps about the house, always finds an excuse not to help out and leaves his Mum and Dad to do everything .
Lyrics
Hey-ya, hey-ya, come on now, come on now
(la-la, la-la)
Oh-oh
Sheila Mary with the tidy grin, she’s checking every corner
Shoes on the mat, socks in the bin, plates stacked like they oughta
She walks in slow, inspects the sink, whispers nothin’ but a list
"Put it away, put it away" — she says it once, she says it twice, she says it like this
Put it away, put it away, put it away (put it away)
She’s kind and soft, she holds the door
But leave one cup and hear the roar
She’s gentle, yeah — but don’t ignore
Sheila’s got her list and then some more (then some more)
Welcome to the family, welcome to the show
Sheila Mary cleans it up, neat from head to toe
Chiara runs the treadmill, boasts about the miles (kee-ar-ah)
Johnny Big Time talks big, flashes all his files
Welcome to the family, welcome to the show
Welcome to the family, everybody, here we go
Welcome to the family, welcome to the show
(yeah, yeah, yeah) Welcome to the family, here we go
Chiara — Kee-ar-ah — thigh-high energy, sneakers on the line
Half marathon queen, she’ll tell you twice: ‘‘I ran it, yes I did’’ every time
She’s beautiful and clever, quick with jokes and quick with sass
But when it comes to plates and laundry piles, she’s got masterclass in pass
She says she’s green, she says she’s pure, vegetarian on the wall
But Sunday roast appears like magic and disappears above us all
She’s funny, sharp, and pinches pennies like a pro
Mood swings like a metronome, soft then hit that low
She won’t lift a broom, won’t lift a spoon — that’s part of the show (part of the show)
Welcome to the family, welcome to the show
Sheila Mary cleans it up, neat from head to toe
Chiara runs the treadmill, boasts about the miles (kee-ar-ah)
Johnny Big Time talks big, flashes all his files
Welcome to the family, welcome to the show
Welcome to the family, everybody, here we go
Welcome to the family, welcome to the show
(oh-oh) Welcome to the family, here we go
Stefan struts, cap tilted back — ‘‘I’ll be a doctor, watch me climb’’
Calls himself Johnny Big Time, big brain, big talk, big rhyme
Handsome, talented, got the plan, but says "I’m busy" every time
Leaves the chores to Mum and Dad — leaves the washing on the line
He’s lazy with the dishes, lazy with the bins (lazy with the bins)
But proud when he explains anatomy like he’s carved it on the wind
"I study hard, I save the world" — yeah, he’s got that boastful beat
But when it’s time to do the laundry, he’s gone — off his feet
Welcome to the family, welcome to the show
Sheila Mary cleans it up, neat from head to toe
Chiara runs the treadmill, boasts about the miles (kee-ar-ah)
Johnny Big Time talks big, flashes all his files
Welcome to the family, welcome to the show
Welcome to the family, everybody, here we go
Welcome to the family, welcome to the show
(come on) W
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